I am having
restless sleep past couple of days. I end up waking in the night several times to
check the updates on Facebook and my emails. I don’t know what am I looking for
or to put it more correctly, whom.
But this
feeling of uncertainty is surely taking a toll on my mind and inner peace. Lately I have been trying to try a lot of new
things which I had never ever dreamed of. I liked most of them and wondered why
I didn’t try them before. Like , my hand at cooking…. or cross stitch…. Or reading
Paulo Coelho which I dreaded ever since I read first few pages of the
Alchemist.
Earlier my
mind was always pre-occupied with some goals that I had set for my life and I
was always busy planning how to achieve them. But now, it’s like a blank blackboard,
dying to get scribbled.
On the
outside I may portray a fake image of mine who is very independent, courageous,
brave enough to fight back anything that comes up in life but I know from
within I am as insecure as scared as any one of you. I seek happiness in company.
And the more I try to run away from it the more it has begun to haunt me. I try
to lead my life exactly as is expected out of me by my parents and the society
but from within there is a nomad in me who wants to escape.
